we're chasing vodka with high fives
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
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