you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
She needs sedatives and a leash
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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