I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I enjoy the company of your penis
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize