Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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