She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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