I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize