hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
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