The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
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nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
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He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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