I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I want to stick my p in your. b.
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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