I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
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