I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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