I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize