HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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