I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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