i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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