I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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