Texts From Last Night

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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.

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  (678): Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box. http://tfl.nu/7k9p
  Replies (12) Good night (666) Bad night (3356) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them

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  (612): at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them http://tfl.nu/fxji
  Replies (37) Good night (717) Bad night (3677) Order T-Shirt
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom

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  (410): I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom http://tfl.nu/r4rn
  Replies (67) Good night (634) Bad night (6030) Order T-Shirt
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  (805): View more from California

  they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate

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  (805): they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate http://tfl.nu/r0av
  Replies (22) Good night (8876) Bad night (1190) Order T-Shirt
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.

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  (860): his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate. http://tfl.nu/ds0z
  Replies (14) Good night (857) Bad night (5137) Order T-Shirt
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.

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  (312): I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix. http://tfl.nu/qngr
  Replies (63) Good night (4735) Bad night (1711) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup

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  (203): You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup http://tfl.nu/qk1q
  Replies (12) Good night (4123) Bad night (1647) Order T-Shirt
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.

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  (804): I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights. http://tfl.nu/u1l7
  Replies (4) Good night (2421) Bad night (660) Order T-Shirt
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.

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  (678): If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me. http://tfl.nu/3kcp
  Replies (5) Good night (1306) Bad night (1663) Order T-Shirt
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.

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  (815): I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes. http://tfl.nu/pp2q
  Replies (6) Good night (1679) Bad night (1019) Order T-Shirt
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.

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  (+61): I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in. http://tfl.nu/ilgv
  Replies (9) Good night (2857) Bad night (410) Order T-Shirt
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Oh my god

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  (336): I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown (336): Oh my god http://tfl.nu/ejg0
  Replies (3) Good night (323) Bad night (694)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.

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  (970): He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart. http://tfl.nu/gryu
  Replies (12) Good night (513) Bad night (951) Order T-Shirt
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.

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  (410): If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board. http://tfl.nu/zly7
  Replies (4) Good night (819) Bad night (387) Order T-Shirt
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words

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  (704): She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words http://tfl.nu/kxrj
  Replies (5) Good night (688) Bad night (148) Order T-Shirt

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