if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
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