Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize