omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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