he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
did you just send me my own nude
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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