Are we in a gay sports bar?
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
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