i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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