the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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