He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize