I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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