I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Who died my cat blue again?
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize