and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
what day is it and did you see me today?
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
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