There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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