Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize