24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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