you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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