Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
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He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
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