Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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