Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Randomize