I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize