Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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