Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Randomize