Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
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