I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Randomize