Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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