forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
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He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
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This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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