I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize