well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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