Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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