So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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