A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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