Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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