just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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