So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize